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Proof I Have A Big Heart

Now I know why some of my LiveJournal friends take photos of themselves at the doctor's office with tubes up their nose. I think it's because they hook you up to these machines, and then leave the room, leaving you alone with your cell phone and nothing else to do. As a youth, I would take that "alone time" to plunder the office for medical supplies that I would use for kinky fun back in my college dorm room later.

I'm having a few medical issues, but hopefully nothing to worry about. This was an EKG test for an enlarged heart, which is ok. I need to exercise more and lose weight - at 235 pounds, I'm the heaviest I've ever been in my life. I'm more worried about my upcoming colonoscopy. I've never had one of those before. I'm worried I will like it too much!

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Thanks to my mom having had colon cancer ( she's fine now) I've been getting a colonoscopy regularly since 35. ugh. That MoviPrep is bad but better than it used to be years ago.

The upside? You lose weight. Win! The downside? Try as I did there was/is no way to eroticize any of it. Oh well. And after the procedure it was definitely not erotic either. Farting while partly drugged is funny (especially the doc's encouragement to do so) but not hot.

After my mother's surgery for ovarian cancer, her lower GI collapsed, and they were worried, until she started farting....

Whatever the meds they gave her were, loopiness was a side effect, and she'd call me in the middle of the night (3 time zones away), and tell me, "Never call it farting again! It is A PRAYER!!!"!

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