March 5th, 2009


Stretch Arm Strong

This Friday night, 03/06/2009, I am going to the Rubber Night at the Chaps II bar in San Francisco.

I love wearing rubber. I love the smell and the look and the feel. I like how it's restraining, but you can still move... the latex pulling at your limbs like a second skin. I feel like an alien creature - sexy and exotic and otherwordly. Plus I can get muddy or pissed on, and everything washes right off! Lately, I had two (argh) latex shirts tear, so I've been getting into heavy industrial rubber... huge eight eighth-inch thick hazmat suits with fully enclosed breathing that weigh 80 pounds or more.

It's the safest sex there is. {grin} Please let me know if you stop by the bar by texting me at 303-594-9220. I'll be at Chaps II from about 9:00 pm to 11:00 pm. Hope to see you there!
  • Current Music
    L.L. Cool J "I'm Bad" and "I Need Love"

What Is The Sound Of One Ear Flapping?

Since the beginning of the year, I've been meditating for 15 minutes every day. I'm not very good at it, as you can imagine, because I'm a hyperactive fuck. But when I was in Japan for a semester in college, I started studying zazen by reading koans and sitting shikantaza (translated as "to sit and do nothing else").

I sit in the middle of the room. I used to have a yoga mat, but I seem to have misplaced it. Instead, lately I use a grey circular mat that says "NYC sewer". Fitting for me, huh? I usually sit in a half lotus ("hankafuza") posture, my back straight and my hands cupped in a bowl shape in my lap. My eyes lowered, but not actually closed so I am awake. In Japan, the Master used to come behind you and hit you with a stick if he thought you were sleeping. Maybe *that's* why I liked zazen so much! {grin}

The goal is to breathe deep into my stomach (the "hara"), and to think about nothing. That's the hard part. I picture a beautiful mountain lake. Each thought I have is like a stone being thrown into the lake and rippling outward. Some days, the lake is a mess of waves and sympathetic resonance. Other days, even the idea of the lake goes away, and the ripples in the lake turn into blackness, with a weird neon screensaver, like the pulses in the early WinAmp visualizer. Maybe you know what I mean.

Sometimes, I hit the jackpot, and my brain goes away entirely. It's kind of like being on poppers. I've been getting there less and less lately. So, I decided to shift my meditation a little. Here is what I've been doing lately:

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  • Current Music
    Pink "U + Ur Hand"