- Complete monogamy (no cheating, lots of sex, “I only have eyes for you”)
- Monogamy with fantasies (no cheating, but one or both people think about it)
- Limited sex (still monogamous, but grudging. Being tired or busy often an excuse)
- No sex (e.g. LBD = Lesbian Bed Death, but still monogamous)
- Monogamy with three ways (includes “play parties”… both partners are present)
- Throw the dog a bone (monogamy, but several times a year one partner gets to play with someone else)
- The Pig and the Prude (one partner doesn’t want very much sex, and the other is always horny)
- Sex pigs (been together 20 years, still have searing hot sex every night with each other and anything else)
- Master/slave (several varieties: collared, uncollared, play, temporary, serious, sash-winning)
- Daddy/boy (Again several varieties: sugar daddy, Palm Desert retiree, twentysomehing whore, Bear/cub)
- The teasing couple (say they do three-ways, and advertise on websites, but they don’t actually do it)
- The internet player (monogamous, but “will perform on webcam” or give hot chats and emails)
- Cheating (bathhouses, Craigslist, websites, often anonymous and fleeting)
- “Don’t ask don’t tell” (not cheating since there is permission, but one partner doesn’t want to hear the details)
- Open relationship, total honesty (both partners are pigs, and love to describe their tricks, often sharing)
- Open relationship, with rules (written down list of things partner can/can’t do)
- Open relationship, faking it (trying to open the relationship without thinking about it first)
- “You do your thing” (one partner has a kinky specialized interest, and gets to indulge that outside the relationship)
- The accidental tourist (one or both partners travel a lot, and play when away)
- Two mortgages, one bed (separate apartments, though only one is lived in)
- “Roommates” (live together and love each other, but no sex. Check in with each other a few times a day)
- Polyamory, functional (or partly functional “as long as Mary is in a good mood and not causing drama”)
- Polyamory, dysfunctional (only works when one or more people are out of town)
- Household (like polyamory, but with a website)
- Single, monk (no sex, focusing on other things than sex right now)
- Single, whore (too busy to settle down with just one man)
- Single, bitter (“I’ll never be in a relationship again”)
- Single, playing house (occasionally fakes it by forming a weekend or one-night relationship with a friend)
- “Girlfriend who lives in Canada” (single, but swears he is in a relationship with someone he sees twice a year)
- And the current smart idea I have: the personal life trainer on the side (schedule an appointment with the coach, and train hard)
Choose wisely
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Bad Clams
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Bad Math
Quiz time: I was trying to read a building schematic yesterday, and there was an interior wall that was 7 3/8 inches long on the blueprint. In the…
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Worst CD art of 2012
How can a designer put this out? I realize CDs don't have the real estate of an LP anymore... but these examples are just huge wastes of space.…
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Bad Clams
This is a trap, so hopefully all new spam comments will go to here.
-
Bad Math
Quiz time: I was trying to read a building schematic yesterday, and there was an interior wall that was 7 3/8 inches long on the blueprint. In the…
-
Worst CD art of 2012
How can a designer put this out? I realize CDs don't have the real estate of an LP anymore... but these examples are just huge wastes of space.…
